PATRICK BUTLER: Fighting Attitudes of Ingratitude with "Honoring"

10 October 2010

Patrick Butler column, "Under The Waterfall"

"Honoring"

   There seems to be a lot of “honoring” going on just now in various circles of believers these days. "Honoring" is where people say publicly what they have known for years – their lives have been enriched by others, and they are now grateful enough to say something about it.

   This is much more than a nice exercise making someone feel good in the congregation or office. The reason honoring is important is that ingratitude - not being thankful - is a spiritual killer. Ingratitude is one of the fastest ways to jump off the spiritual ship headed to healing and wholeness in God.  For some reason, God asks us to be grateful. Perhaps he knows this is the open door to deeper understanding many of us would like to walk through.  

    The idea has taken off in the church-at-large.  International gatherings of believers I've seen recently from Oklahoma to Tijuana, Mexico are busy tracing their pasts and giving honor where it was due. What I've seen is not the exaltation of men or women, but the breaking of the footholds of bitterness, past pains and disagreements.

      And it is so accepted to suddenly "honor" someone publicly now, that it's much easier to fight attitudes of ingratitude now than it was, say,  a year ago. Many people seem  to understand telling others they are appreciated for their gifts is a good and right. People are getting in on the spiritual benefits of honoring, which include forgiveness, putting aside of past hurts and wounds, reconciliation and restoration of fellowship - perhaps to the point of lasting friendships. Honoring also seems to revive the vision to work together and move forward, giving extra, added energy to people's lives and the spiritual work at hand. 

   There is so much benefit, it seems, so much spiritual mileage to get out of "honoring"  it's surprising it's taken so long to see it done on a large scale.   What seems to have prevented this, as people are talking this concept through, is either a false sense of self-sufficiency (pride), hurt and offense (pride), a doubt others deserve it (probably pride) or a sense that God has never personally really brought anyone around to help us (disbelief). 

   So a spiritual "weapon" as it were, against pride and disbelif in the personal life is the heart-felt honoring of others.  You can't really do it unless the ingratitude attitudes are fought and dismissed. This will also bring healing to people who have been buffetted  or "beat up" beyond belief in their spiritual lives, by being over-looked or working nearly alone for years.

     I remember when author Joy Dawson challenged a group of Chrisitians to overcome hardness of heart and articulate thanks and gratitude to those who helped them be the people they were that day. We owed them, she said, a great debt of gratitude for enabling us in our ministries and personal lives. It was pride, she added, that kept us from doing this.

    Is not God revealing himself to us by the faithful gift of encouragement from others? And Isn’t “honoring” others really honoring God for having put people  in my path at the right time, to say the right thing, in the right way, with the right motivation, with the right result, making my life easier?

     If this seems too emotionally difficult to do, isn't that precisely the reason it must be done?   There are many attitudes needing to be “broken” that have a hold on us, creating a spiritual blindness. Isn't anything that breaks the pride of “separation” from humanity  a breakthrough?